Day 281: O' Sleep, Where art thou?

Sleep is just a state of mind, right? It must be if not everyone needs the same amount. Atom apparently needs very little at this point. My wife and I unfortunately need more. And there never seems enough.

Is it a by-product of being deprived of the sweet Maui air? Or the lightly lapping Pacific waves? We may never know the cause but sleep has been very elusive for Atom the last two months. We have tried everything. Putting Atom to sleep later, earlier, over stuffed, well exercised, sleepy, wide awake, etc. We have shored up his schedule and tried to stick to it as much as possible but his sleep cycle is still inconsistent. Is he teething, admiring his new skills (standing, sitting), in the midst of a growth spurt, what? As of now it is hard to tell but what we do know is that we may never know why he is sleeping so unevenly.

We will continue trying as much as we can to get him back inline with what his body needs. But in the meantime even during the wee hours of the night, when we are straining to keep our eyes open, strolling him around the house or rocking him in a chair we will continue to wonder what his thinking, try to soothe him and hope he finds some sweet dreams soon.

New tricks: Momentarily standing without support, mimicry (will angry face back at us if we do it to him, will stick his tongue out back at us when we do it to him), another new round of peek-a-boo where he pulls the towel in front of his own face

Day 252: Sleepless in Jersey

The days of 80 degrees and nights of 70 are long gone and so it seems are Atom's sleeping habits. He has never been one for ultra consistent sleep habits but some where over the deep blue Pacific Atom's sleep switch shorted out. 

He started out like many babies and had a rough first three or so months of life. Sleep, eat, poop then repeat. All day and ALL NIGHT. Around 4 months he took mercy on us and started sleeping through the night. No consistent nap cycle during the day, he liked to keep it fluid in case something cool was happening, but 8 or 9 hours at night became the norm. We were elated. We were suddenly refreshed. We were cocky.

We knew the nap thing was in need of repair but at least a full nights sleep meant we could probably eventually out smart him with our faculties refreshed nightly. So we planned and planned and planned again about how we were going to now tackle this nap issue. I mean we had conquered the night sleeping thing, right? In fact what was the rush? "Let's celebrate our anniversary in Maui and then knock napping out of the park!"

Atom slept and slept on the flights to and fro from the 808 state in some kind of Lasker Trap that was clearly over our heads because we bought it.

Now we would give anything for 6 hours of uninterrupted nocturnal bliss. Atom has lost that sleeping feeling and seems almost worst when it comes to naps. Maybe the fun in the sun was too much for him to process. Who knows? Maybe our trip to Chicago will flip the sleep switch back. Isn't that part of the parenting wisdom? When in doubt pray for a miracle and then take the credit?

• this post is from last week, it just never got posted due to lack of sleep.

Day 173: Magnificent Milestone

Atom will be six months old on Sunday. Six months...hard to believe. Six months of breathing, blinking, burping, bubbling, babbling, bewilderment, and belief (the last three were my wife and I).
I thought in honor of this magnificent milestone I would summarize a few of the things we have learned so far. Don't worry this isn't like a sitcom where they need mid-season filler so they just paste old re-runs together. I hate that. And I hate that those episodes never die either. They should not be a part of the series syndication either. Oh man don't get me started! I talking about you Seinfeld!

I hope I can shine a new light or at least a brighter one now that my wife and I have mastered parenthood. After six months on the job we have obviously learned all there is to know.

Here's what we know (at least when it comes to Atom)…

• Your body can run on even less sleep than you know. You know that record you set way back in college during finals? You dug deep down inside and crammed for that Acting for Non-Theater Majors final? That all-nighter? Well kiss that record good-bye. Infants will take you to all new levels of exhaustion that don't seem possible but are infinitely worth it.
• Take everything that isn't nailed down at the hospital. Blankets, hats, vaseline, whatever you can get your hands on because it will come in handy later.
• The cheaper diapers work just as good/better than the expensive ones. Go cheap if you find one that works.
• You can never take too many pictures.
• All babies are "good" babies. When you are wearing baby goggles your own baby can do no wrong. Just remember not everyone owns goggles.
• Bodily Fluids Flow Freely. The will flow and flow and flow. Our washing machine has almost run non-stop since the beginning. Be prepared.
• If you have a boy, use a wash cloth to cover the privates during diaper changes. (see Bodily Fluid Flow Freely above)
• Babies "bounce" better than you do. Babies are tough and flexible. You are probably not. Comfortably position yourself BEFORE you hold the baby, feed the baby, or carry the baby.
• Take turns watching the baby. Everyone loves the baby and cherishes every moment with him but even Jesus needed a day to recoup.
• The unexpected is just that.
• Prepare to talk to everyone about your child. You will find yourself working him into the oddest conversations uncontrollably.

Person 1: "Pauly D grabs like 40 gallons of gel and is like WHAM!"
Person 2: "The show is like a social experiment."
ME: "Speaking of experiments you should have seen Atom's diaper this morning."

• Laughter. It is sometimes your only weapon against a tired baby.
• Singing anything to Atom can help navigate to a happy place. Even if you don't know the words. Just make them up. Babies don't know the difference.
• Swaddling isn't for everyone.

Above anything else…enjoy your baby. Enjoy the looks on other people's faces when they see him. Enjoy his bizarre noises that dismantle the din surrounding you. Enjoy the moment when he hates lying on his stomach. Enjoy the moment when he hates lying on his back. Enjoy the moment when he finds his hands, his feet, and his voice. Enjoy the wonderment in his eyes at trees, cars, and ceiling fans. Enjoy the feeling that overcomes you at seeing him, hearing him, and holding him. Enjoy your renewed belief in all that is right with the world…and enjoy it while it lasts because the teenage years are quickly approaching.

Day 35 - On sleep

Sleep: perchance to dream: aye, there's the rub...The rub being in this case a lack of dreaming or REM sleep. I actually got 5 and a half hours sleep last night, not consecutive mind you, and what a difference it made. I was pepped and ready to take on the world for at least 20 minutes this morning. Watch out!

So the one thing people keep saying to you when you have an infant on the way is "SLEEP, SLEEP, SLEEP". Sleep whenever you can and when the baby comes sleep when he does.
 Sounds like a simple enough idea. So simple and obvious that it is almost insulting. I am not the baby here and I can figure out when I am tired and when I need rest. Been doing it for years and besides I don't need that much sleep anyway. I have been running off small amounts of sleep since college and have done nicely with this arrangement.

A baby, on the other hand, needs lots of sleep. Depending on what you are reading, a baby's need to sleep could reach upwards of 18 hours a day. So again this "sleep, sleep, sleep" thing sounds painfully easy to grapse. New parents get 18 hours to sleep too, right. Surely one can squeeze a nap in there somewhere. Well...I (and my wife) have not taken a single conventional nap yet. We have tried giving each other a "break" by letting each other sleep for one of the eating cycles (i'll get into those later) either early in the morning or late at night. It is like a little sleep appetizer that is enough to remind you how much you like sleep but not enough to satisfy any real hunger because the baby rarely ever sleeps more than 2-3 between feeds. It turns out once you add normal life activities to the baby routine, or lack there of, 18 hours of sleep becomes elusive.

I'm sure we will find the time to steal some sleep in the future or at least that is what people tell us. It is true that Atom has created such a drive in me to stay awake and to watch his every move but that doesn't stop me from occasionally daydreaming of days past where sleep was so abundant that I never felt the need to over indulge.